Leave the poor lass alone

So a few weeks ago, we had news that Kate Middleton is pregnant again… if you were to believe the tabloids and gossip mags that is. Then only a matter of days later, it was deemed she couldn’t be, because she dared to have some wine whilst visiting a vineyard in New Zealand.

This story has aggravated me on so many levels, even putting aside the whole press harassment / Diana argument. The poor girl had the announcement of her first, historic, pregnancy ripped away from her so can’t we at least grant her the privacy to reveal any future pregnancies in her own time? And, what’s more, why does having a glass of wine therefore mean she can’t be pregnant? Oh yes, of course, it’s because if any pregnant woman is irresponsible enough to have a modest amount of alcohol in isolated incidents during gestation then she will have a baby with three heads and be condemned to eternal damnation… Thus spake the gospel according to the misinformed maternity militia whose only purpose seems to be spreading half-truths and scaremonger. 

There seems to be this parallel universe you enter into when you are pregnant or a new mum that gives others some sort of right to tell you how to live your life, whether they are aware of current guidelines or not. And even more aggravating, the frequency with which said guidelines change is mind-boggling! Even in the short period between my pre and post-pregnancy chapters, the pendulum on the guidelines for alcohol consumption has swung from one end to the other and back again! Then there’s the u-turns on sushi, hair dye, soft cheese, deep space voyages… Ok so maybe not the last but you get my gist. Thankfully, I came across a ruddy good read, Pregnancy for Modern Girls which gave me much needed frank and down to earth advice amongst the myriads of contradictory and confusing tomes dictating “What to Expect” and the like (By the way, What to Expect is about as much use as a chocolate teapot if you want my opinion - stop telling me not to do something and then tell me not to worry if I’ve done it as it’s unlikely to harm my baby!!) Together with the well-researched Bumpology, Pregnancy for Modern Girls cut to the chase, didn’t preach and presented both sides of story wherever possible. Which was just what I needed; and so after considering how I (not anyone else) felt on the matter, I happily ordered an occasional glass of Pinot with my  goat’s cheese salad. After all, I reasoned, you can’t tell me the French don’t have an occasional bite of brie whilst up the duff.

I’m sure that if I’d had a higher risk pregnancy or had a heartbreaking history of miscarriages and TTC I’d have acted differently, but as it was, I didn’t so I made informed choices for my situation. And yet so many people felt the need to comment or pre-suppose - “Oh you won’t be wanting wine”, “I don’t think you can eat prawns” - which then put me in the uncomfortable situation of justifying my actions. 

Look, I’m not trying to say that when you’re pregnant you should go out and get sloshed. Nor am I saying that you should simply ignore official guidance, even though it does seem to change every fourth minute and is pretty much impossible to keep up with. What I am saying is taking a common sense approach, consider the evidence (both anecdotal and scientific), weigh up the risks for your own circumstances and then proceed accordingly. But for goodness’ sake stay out of other people’s business, and leave the poor Duchess of Cambridge alone!